Lyrics

Most of the time I get too excited to enunciate, so maybe we can clear some things up.  Most of these songs are about getting your junk cut off anyway…

HERB CRUST
Herb Crust, now that was a guy
somebody, sometime
he fell in the wrong.
It was the right place
time was unkind
he was wanted and tried
it looked like he’s gone.
But then who comes back in swinging strong?
He was singing a song, I hear it all the time:

“You’re just a fag!” Oh!
“A load of crap!” You’re!
“A washed up hack!” Thanks
Bitch, I knew that.
“You’re just a fag!” Oh!
“A load of crap!” You’re!
“A washed up hack!” Thanks
but, I knew that.

Herb Crust, now that was the guy
on everyone’s minds
he was sparkling fun.
In a wipe-out, caught by surprise
in the blink of an eye
the damage was done.
And guess who comes back in swinging strong?
He was singing a song, I hear it all the time:

“You’re just a fag!” Oh!
“A load of crap!” You’re!
“A washed up hack!” Thanks
Bitch, I knew that.
“You’re just a fag!” Oh!
“A load of crap!” You’re!
“A washed up hack!” Thanks
but, I knew that.

Now do I fill your needs emotionally
or do I physically tread on
every idea and thing?
every personal name?
shit on the stars you were wishing on?

No.

“You’re just a fag!” Oh!
“A load of crap!” You’re!
“A washed up hack!” Thanks
Bitch, I knew that.
“You’re just a fag!” Oh!
“A load of crap!” You’re!
“A washed up hack!” Thanks.

GENTLE BEARDED MAN
Amen and good God
the shadows thou has cast upon
from the building on the front
where the architect laid dead and gone.
Asbestos gets the best of us,
Rudolph died, like the rest of us
he was waiting, getting restless
at the hands of modern touch.
But who could resist such a
well paid, high-end job?
You could save some money
building from your garage.
Or you could waste your time
being loud with the mics turned up.
So please waste your time
being loud, with the mics turned up!

Are your eyes always moving?
Are you aware of what they’re doing?
Are you shaking like a leaf?
Or do you work like a machine?
Can you bear the glass that broke beneath your feet?
Can you smile, act polite, and do not scream?
When you hear the man? He’s coming down the street.
He’s got a bloody nose, and a tooth runs through his cheek.
That’s Brian, says he wants to buy a gun.
Yeah, Brian says he wants to buy a gun.
It’s a line of self defense from violent punks.
This gentle bearded man just wants his gun.

Can you bear the glass that broke beneath your feet?
Can you smile, act polite, and do not scream?
When you hear the man? He’s coming down the street.
He’s got a bloody nose, and a tooth runs through his cheek.
That’s Brian, says he wants to buy a gun.
Yeah, Brian says he wants to buy a gun.
It’s a line of self defense from violent punks.
This gentle bearded man just wants his gun.

KING MAX
You’re great at explaination
cutaways, transparencies.
You could plot across my heart
and blast it into smithereens.
Or write a song to reassure
everything was as it seems.
Stray away from history
invent selective scenes.

But I’m the king of making up
what I’m imagining
Yeah, I’m the one to blame
who ruined everything.
But I’m the king of making up
what I’m imagining
Yeah, I’m the one to blame
who ruined everything.

You would rather be a girl who knew for certain
than commit suicide by
Wheel of Fortune.
Would you rather be a girl who knew for certain?
Or commit suicide by
Wheel of Fortune?

You need to find a new plan, you need to find another man.
At the fountain of grief there’s not enough for you and me.

You’re love is like a weapon
and people get hurt.
Your love is such a burden
you hurt yourself first.
Your love was everything
that I was looking for.
Now your love is gone
I can’t take it anymore.

You would rather be a girl who knew for certain
than commit suicide by
Wheel of Fortune.
Would you rather be a girl who knew for certain?
Or commit suicide by
Wheel of Fortune?

You will devise a new plan, one to entrap another man
in your fountain of grief there’s not enough for you and me.




SPY CAT
I want to collect the sunshine
wring it from your eyes
and break your neck
like a pack of candy cigarettes.

You were such a criminal
acting like you got away with it.
I won’t let you get away.

My elbows are ready to rebuild
my back and knees will say the same.
But my hands, they aren’t so steady.
You’re a crime-wave.
You’re a crime-wave.

I want to collect the sunshine
wring it from your eyes
and break your neck
like a pack of candy cigarettes.
You’re a crime-wave.
You’re a crime-wave.


INDIGENT KING
He’s the saddest man the world forgot.
Forget about them now.
He’s the victim of a kingdom
nobody’s figured out.
He’s a sad man, he can’t even laugh and see the irony.
What’s causing the misery that he can’t live without?

So take those crooks, and rope their sides
with baseball bats, brass knuckles, and knives.
You could aim a gun between your eyes
but doing nothing is an act of violence.
Doing nothing is an act of violence.
Doing nothing is an act of violence.

With a coin between your fingers you could wish for it all.
But the blind man’s gold is just a pillar made of salt.
So ask for it angrily, and demand menacingly
details of the heresy responsible in fault.
But you could not recall in the bliss of alcohol
that the blind man’s gold was just a pillar made of salt.
They were leaders in a set of their own doubtful sympathies.
Leaders in a set of their own doubtful sympathies.

So take those crooks, and rope their sides
with baseball bats, brass knuckles, and knives.
You could aim a gun between your eyes
but doing nothing is an act of violence.
Doing nothing is an act of violence.
Doing nothing is an act of violence.

GOD IS LOVE
Big hands are shaking
my body’s so vacant.
You’re killing me, I can’t help it.
That was my choice all along
corpses have more fun- torture!

God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome

Camp on an island
marshmallows are frying.
Made with the cream
of your b-b-b-bones!
I can’t spend one more single night
out here on my own.
Artifacts ward off
your g-g-g-ghost!!

God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome

When your hope starts to slip
like the tread on your soul
straighten up and let it out:
I won’t take no more!
When your hope starts to slip
like the tread on your soul
straighten up and let it out:
I won’t take no more!!

God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome
God is Love
Love is Sex
Sex is Death
Death, Awesome

THE “PEANUT BUTTER” ONE
First I’m nervous, then I stutter
my tongue’s made of peanut butter
you’re stuck to me.
And your hands are gently folding
tiny bones, desperately holding on
to luxuries.

But I’m a dirty broke guy
not much to hold out for.
I’m not even surprised
unemployed at twenty-four.
I can’t take you to the drive-thru
but I’ll dumpster dive into your heart
on a spring board made of two by fours.

I’m just a guy
and I don’t feel like myself much anymore.
I need a life
yours!

It’s true your eyes are made out of tea leaves
how else could anybody explain it?
I mean it looked like we were struck by a moonbeam.
but I don’t heard nobody complaining.

That I’m a dirty broke guy
not much to hold out for.
I don’t do black tie
you’ll be out on the dance floor.
I can’t take you to the drive-thru
but I’ll dumpster dive into your heart
on a spring board made of two by fours.

I’m just a guy
and I don’t feel like myself much anymore.
I need a life
yours!
I’m just a guy
and I don’t feel like myself much anymore.
I need a life
yours!

 /  Notes